At one point I had over 1,100 pending application requests on Facebook. I don’t say that proudly, I don’t say it in wonderment; I say it with flat out annoyance. While I think there are tons of great Facebook applications there are a ton that may or may not have been built to specifically annoy me. Each Friday I am going to bring a little whimsy to this blog and review five of my currently 100 pending apps per week. I figure with the rate they come it will take me 50 years to review them all. This is meant to be some lighthearted fun.
Here are this weeks five:
What they say: Make a difference, on Facebook.
Causes lets you start and join the causes you care about. Donations to causes can benefit over a million registered 501(c)(3) nonprofits and major presidential campaigns.
What I say: Honestly this is a wonderful and purely generous idea for an application. There are some causes with matching funds and various other gimmicks around them. The intent and execution are solid but I have to say when it comes down to it all it is another way for someone to bug me and make me feel guilty to donate more money. Charity donations like religion and politics should be a personal thing. Or at least that is what I say when people question me about what I donate to. (For the record it is Camp Good Days and Special Times.)
What they say: Kidnap! is an international game of Nap or be Nap’d! Pick your favorite city in the world and cram all your Friends inside! Eight Ball in a Sock! Giant Flypaper! Choose one of 40 methods and make your move. The more people you Kidnap, the better Napper you become. But beware…other players will be out to Kidnap you too! Only your traveler’s wits can help you escape and get back in the game.
What I say: I’d like to kidnap whomever made the application that 15 of my friends felt the need to annoy the hell out of me by kidnapping me. Plus when I see it I just think of Mel Gibson screaming “Give Me Back My Son.”
(Lil) Green Patch
What they say: By planting fruit with your friends you can help us all make the world a greener place! As well, we’ll shortly be launching some fun gaming features to constantly keep you entertained while doing good!
Our sponsors contribute money to save the Rainforests as you use this application. After expenses we will donate revenue to funding a portfolio of reforestation projects. Thanks for joining us in this mission! We hope you have fun!
What I say: These do gooder applications are killing me. I can’t make fun of something that has actual substance behind it. Another well-meaning application that will make you question your life and feel guilty for not being a better person.
What they say: Want to grow your Entourage quickly?
What I say: Yup that’s it, there is no description to what the game actually is. It looks like some role playing game but it has sex in the title and a hot picture so apparently people just download it. Before you download the application it says something about “social lubricant”, personally that sounds like it may burn.
What they say: A strategic RPG game of conquest and glory.Go from being a marooned warrior to becoming the greatest warlord of the land.
What I say: If I were actually into RPG’s I pluck down the money on World of Warcraft, Everquest, or whatever 40 year old virgins play in their mother’s basements these days.